“This little book teaches a big lesson in waking us up so we become aware of when we are being manipulated by subtle hate and the antidotes to succumbing to it.” 

Kay Lindahl, Author  “The Sacred Art of Listening

… anyone who has been feeling the tension of these topics, either by way of the media’s coverage of events across the country and world, or localized situations, would truly find this handbook useful to  help sort through feelings or emotions. The book also offers suggested approaches to some situations that I’m sure nearly any reader can sympathize with.   

Meg Andrews

If ever there was a time when the contents of this book were mandatory to read that time is now. The world festers with religious wars, classroom shootings, terrorism, religious prejudice, racial intolerance, the growing schism between the haves and the have-nots. The kernels behind this disruption of humanistic behavior is hate and Omeara carefully show us how hate is born and how it is used and then offers insights on perceiving the beginnings of hate and how to reverse those impulses.  

Grady Harp


If someone you love has joined a religious “cult” or such a group has moved into your neighborhood or they are becoming active in your community or any similar situation occurs then this book is where you should start when wondering what to do. It is not an exposition about the beliefs of various religious groups nor what defines a cult from a religion or any such thing. Instead it deals with an all too common problem, people basing their understanding of a group on prejudiced things they have heard, gossip or similar information. It deals with the alienation that often follows when parents and friends don’t understand why a person joins a different religious group. It also deals with how to recover that communication and recover the relationship. 

Harold McFarland

This is a sensible guidebook for anyone who is concerned about the religious choices of others. Written out of the experience of helping thousands of concerned parents, friends, neighbors, etc., this book explains how to address the “problem” of a loved one joining a religion one doesn’t fully understand.

Logically, the first recommendation is to “calm down” so one can be effective in addressing the situation. Then a range of choices are given… advice on actual steps one can take to restore or improve communication, and why that is important, pitfalls to avoid in these situations (like deprogrammers), how to communicate your concerns to your loved one without alienating him or trampling on his rights, etc.

Surprisingly enough, the book gives good advice for parents about how to prepare one’s child for the myriad of religious choices out there! Very useful for just about any parent. 

Jane James